ZERO PARADES: For Dead Spies is one of those RPGs where getting every achievement is almost a completely different experience from simply finishing the story. The game constantly tracks your decisions, ideology, relationships, quest outcomes, and even your failures. Some achievements are earned naturally, while others require very specific dialogue choices, exploration, hidden interactions, or even intentionally getting your character killed.
Before attempting a full completion run, it is highly recommended to maintain several manual saves. Certain quests can become unavailable due to bugs, while others branch into mutually exclusive outcomes that prevent earning every achievement in a single playthrough.
ZERO PARADES For Dead Spies 100% Achievement Guide
These achievements are either earned naturally through progression or require very minor interaction during the story.
Introspection (Conditioning)
One of the earliest achievements available.
Throughout the game, conversations and events unlock Thoughts. These function similarly to personality traits and ideological developments that shape your character. Once you obtain your first Thought, open the Introspection menu and select it.
Choose the option to contemplate or internalize the Thought.
The achievement unlocks immediately afterward.
Many players accidentally unlock this within the first hour, but it can be missed if you ignore the Introspection system entirely.
The Whole Sick Crew
This achievement is tied to one of the game’s early story investigations.
During the main storyline, you eventually gain access to Tempo’s apartment. Once inside, search the desk thoroughly.
A skill check appears.
Passing the check allows you to discover an old photograph showing the members of the legendary “Whole Sick Crew.”
Take the photograph to unlock the achievement.
This achievement is easy to miss because many players leave the apartment immediately after obtaining quest information.
False Advertising
This achievement is story-related and impossible to miss.
As the plot unfolds, you’ll eventually discover the truth behind your assignment and learn about the Great Lich’s reset.
Once this revelation occurs, the achievement automatically unlocks.
Under Pressure
The game tracks three dangerous mental states:
- Fatigue
- Anxiety
- Delirium
Allowing any of these values to reach their maximum can result in negative consequences.
When one reaches its cap and causes you to lose a skill point, the achievement unlocks.
Most players obtain this naturally during their first playthrough.
Motivations Unclear
After speaking with Marco in Party Alley, interact with the nearby terminal.
This triggers an ambush involving the mysterious Headphone Man.
Whether you dodge the incoming attack or get hit by it does not matter.
The achievement unlocks as soon as the encounter occurs.
Help Wanted
Melita serves as your operator throughout the game.
Whenever you find a payphone or use the Miracle Box inside your room, you can contact her.
Call her five separate times during the game.
The calls do not need to occur consecutively.
After the fifth conversation, the achievement unlocks.
Pool of Golden Tears
Near the end of the story, before entering the final stretch of content, visit the photo studio.
Approach the area where ginkgo leaves are falling.
Simply witnessing the scene unlocks the achievement.
There are no skill checks or dialogue requirements.
Good Tourist
This achievement rewards thorough exploration.
You must physically visit every district in the game:
- Kwisok Roundabout
- Black Market
- Old Docks
- Backyard
- Party Alley
- Housing Campaign
- Pitol-Tract
- Temple of War Criminals
Most players naturally visit nearly all of them through quests, but missing a single district prevents the achievement.
If it doesn’t unlock immediately, revisit each area manually.
Why Does the Eye Weep?
The primary story completion achievement.
Finish the game using any ending.
The achievement unlocks after reaching the conclusion of the main narrative.
Crazy Gang Recruitment Achievements
One of the largest side objectives in ZERO PARADES involves rebuilding the Crazy Gang.
Every recruit has their own lengthy questline.
KINDRED COUSIN
Recruit Carolina.
After receiving the quest to rebuild the Crazy Gang, travel to the Old Cinema north of Kwisok Roundabout.
Septimus blocks access initially.
Convince him to let you meet Carolina.
During the conversation chain, Carolina requests a Cosmonaut Figurine.
Obtaining this item requires several trades.
The Merchant King eventually becomes involved in the process, and you’ll need to collect specific trade goods including cigarettes, hair products, and a skirt.
After obtaining the figurine, return to Carolina.
Give her the item and finish the questline.
She joins the Crazy Gang and the achievement unlocks.
PSEUDOPODUS
Recruit the strange creature known as PSEUDOPODUS.
After meeting Yana and the Headphone Man, you acquire the MEGA-OUTLAW device.
To activate it, obtain Lusian batteries.
Possible battery sources include:
- The toy lightsaber from the Black Market
- Merchant King’s collectible items
- Ignatz’s camera
Use the batteries to reactivate the damaged Pseudopod.
You’ll then encounter it multiple times throughout the city.
Locations include:
- Near Ochnik’s Boat
- Photo Studio
- Housing Company
Each encounter advances the storyline.
After the final meeting, you’ll gain the opportunity to recruit it permanently.
HOLOCENE
Perhaps the most complicated recruitment achievement.
After receiving the archive retrieval quest from the Heartless Man, access to Pitol-Tract opens.
Travel to the missile silo and descend to the deepest level.
Here you’ll encounter Holocene.
He requests assistance involving mold samples and encrypted information.
Collect:
- Mold sample
- Cipher
The cipher must be decoded.
You can attempt to solve it yourself or ask an NPC for help.
Be careful because certain outcomes may bug the quest.
Next, locate Holocene’s favorite book inside Reno’s apartment.
Return the book.
Afterward, obtain medicine from Dr. Hugo using the mold sample.
Bring the medicine back and help Holocene recover.
Once cured, he becomes recruitable.
RADIAN
Recruit Ramses.
During the Crazy Gang storyline, a Floating House becomes accessible near the southern coastline.
Visit the location and meet Ramses.
He requires medicine.
Obtaining it involves Dr. Gonzo’s surveillance questline.
You must:
- Place a wiretap
- Gather information
- Use a designated payphone
- Meet a messenger
- Collect the medicine
Deliver the medicine and recruit Ramses.
YANA
One of the game’s major route choices.
To recruit Yana, you must support her during the Ultra-Violet questline.
Reno prepares a pass for Ultra-Violet’s escape.
However, obtaining the pass requires completing inspection requirements and obtaining boar feed from the Menagerie.
The boar feed itself requires additional item trading.
After helping Ultra-Violet leave successfully, Yana remains with your group.
Recruit her for the achievement.
KALEIDOSCOPE
Mutually exclusive with Yana.
Instead of helping Yana’s side, support Alastair, also known as Kaleidoscope or Headphone Man.
This route involves trading Ultra-Violet and making different decisions during the quest finale.
After completing the route, return to recruit Kaleidoscope.
Fatalities Achievement Guide
This category contains some of the funniest and darkest achievements in the game.
Each requires dying in a specific way.
Coffee Addict
In the Backyard district, find the broken coffee vending machine.
Attempt to purchase something.
Kick the machine.
Fail the resulting check.
The machine crushes you.
Achievement unlocked.
Minty Fresh
After 10:00 AM, infiltrate Dr. Gonzo’s office.
Search his desk.
Find the mysterious black pills.
Consume them.
You die almost immediately.
From Ourselves, To Ourselves
During the Palace of Culture questline, discover the ancient bomb.
Learn the activation song from squatters.
Purchase the music disc from Petro.
Play the track while possessing the bomb.
The result is predictable.
If You Die, Die With Music
One of the more elaborate death achievements.
Allow enemies to steal your broken Red Disc after retrieving the archives.
Near the end of the game, recover the repaired version.
Return to your photo studio.
Insert the Red Disc into the player.
The resulting reset kills your character.
Right on the Money
Locate Subcommandant Podpaketny’s television studio.
Fail the required confrontation check.
The subcommandant detonates both himself and you.
Final Breath
While descending through the Pitol-Tract mine, meet Cardiogripper.
Accept his challenge.
Fail the associated check.
Death follows immediately.
My Little Brother
Acquire a firearm.
Visit the Merchant King’s monkey.
Allow the monkey access to your weapon.
This ends exactly as badly as expected.
Tech Support
While visiting Carolina during her recruitment quest, interact with the machine above her.
Attempt to disable it.
Fail the check.
The machine electrocutes you.
Death by Comrade
This death requires following Kurt’s debt storyline.
Eventually you’ll gain access to a basement containing a giant cauldron.
Interact with the cauldron.
Meet Kurt.
Fail the required checks and continue escalating the situation.
You’ll become trapped forever.
Important: befriending the rats beforehand can block this achievement entirely.
Fumes of Freedom
While crafting a homemade firearm, remove your protective face covering.
Fail the safety check involving melted plastic.
Continue inhaling the toxic fumes.
Death follows shortly afterward.
Between the Eyes
Order a firearm from Goat-Eye.
Show up armed.
Threaten him with your own weapon when he demands more money.
He responds by shooting you first.
Deepest Apologies
Meet ESTOC.
Purchase an apology card afterward.
Return home and begin writing.
Fail the writing check.
Your overwhelming remorse becomes fatal.
Forbidden Love
One of the more unusual death achievements.
Flirt with SILHOUETTE throughout multiple encounters.
Eventually locate her secret meeting place.
Instead of attempting romance, draw a weapon.
Fail the non-lethal shot check.
The resulting consequences lead to life imprisonment and effectively count as death.
Walls Have Ears
Complete Ramses’ recruitment.
Acquire wiretap insects.
Attempt to install surveillance equipment.
Fail both major checks.
The operation ends catastrophically.
Office of Thoughts Achievements
These achievements reflect the personality your spy develops throughout the game.
Unlike normal quest achievements, these are tied almost entirely to dialogue choices.
Every major ideology has a corresponding Thought.
After unlocking the Thought, you must actively contemplate it in the Introspection menu.
The People’s Person
Choose communist and collectivist responses throughout the story.
Eventually unlock the Thought “People’s Republic of Illusion.”
Reflect on it.
Performance Art
Frequently apologize, express guilt, and seek forgiveness.
Unlock “World Apology Tour of ’96.”
Contemplate it.
The Why
Choose philosophical and existential dialogue options.
Unlock “Absolute Value.”
Reflect on it.
Shrapnel Soup
Act aggressive, stubborn, and intimidating whenever possible.
Unlock “Empty Floor.”
Reflect on it.
I See Through the Shadows
Embrace conspiracy theories and paranoia.
Unlock “Twilight of the Closed World.”
Reflect on it.
Luzian Allures
Support the technological superiority of La Luz.
Unlock “Messenger of the Absolute Society.”
Reflect on it.
Big Money Business
Prioritize profit, greed, and capitalism.
Unlock “Ultimate End Consumer.”
Reflect on it.
These achievements often require dedicated roleplay runs because opposing ideologies rarely unlock together naturally.
(Continued with Cumulative Achievements, Consumable Guide, Ending Achievements, and all missable route achievements in Part 2.)