If you’re aiming for 100% completion in Fuck’s Quest II, sooner or later you’ll start hunting down the game’s wonderfully ridiculous collectibles known simply as Crap. Despite the name, many of these items are surprisingly well hidden. Some require revisiting earlier areas, others only appear after certain story events, and a few are tucked behind secret walls that are incredibly easy to miss.
The good news is that none of the collectibles are permanently missable if you know when and where to look. This guide walks through every Crap item in the game, explaining exactly how to obtain each one without unnecessary wandering.
Note: The collectibles below are listed in the same order as the in-game Crap menu, making it easier to compare your collection.
World War 2’s Ashes
One of the earliest collectibles that players often overlook.
How to Get It
- Cast Fireball on World War 2 while he’s running the shop.
- Leave the shop without putting out the fire.
- Return later.
You’ll discover that World War 2 has died, and his wife is now running the shop.
Purchase World War 2’s Ashes from her.
All Purpose Chemical Spray
This collectible becomes available later in the story.
How to Get It
After David Donkeyterry joins the army, return to his original location in Cleanville.
The All Purpose Chemical Spray will now be sitting where he used to stand.
Police Flakes
Available after progressing through the Cleanville storyline.
How to Get It
Complete Cleanville Well.
After Factoid has been arrested, visit his gym.
The collectible can be found inside.
Years of Sports Knowledge
Thankfully, this one is almost impossible to miss.
How to Get It
Speak with MyDadNamedMeJohn Terrybones Telemarketson outside the school early in the game.
He’ll reward you with Years of Sports Knowledge.
If you talk to everyone you meet, you’ll naturally obtain this collectible.
Rohnny’s Wallet
A straightforward story reward.
How to Get It
Progress through Bridge to Policy World.
After defeating the area’s miniboss, Rohnny’s Wallet appears nearby.
It’s placed directly along the main path.
Dog Crystals
One of the trickier hidden collectibles.
How to Get It
Before the Secret Army Lab’s time bomb sequence:
- Reach the room with the large pit.
- Destroy the cracked wall on the opposite side.
- Throw the bomb with precise timing.
- Use Power Fart to launch across the gap.
- Climb upward.
The Dog Crystals are hidden in the secret area beyond.
Advanced *******
Available after finishing a specific boss encounter.
How to Get It
- Defeat the boss in Cleanville.
- Re-enter their house afterward.
- Play MAZTER OV BEHAVIOR’s minigame.
- Complete the music challenge.
Your reward is **Advanced *****.
Anti-Suffering Cream
This collectible requires discovering a hidden area.
How to Get It
- Explore Cleanview Well.
- Find the destructible wall hiding Screwbly the Masterful Clown’s circus.
- Complete the circus.
Later, return to town.
Screwbly has killed his brother, Ouch Jr.
Loot Ouch Jr.’s body to obtain the Anti-Suffering Cream.
Naturally Occurring Computer
This collectible is tied to a secret dungeon.
How to Get It
In Car World Graveyard:
- Hug the left wall when entering.
- Find the hidden passage in the upper-left corner.
- Enter the secret area.
- Locate Ur Cousin’s House.
- Complete The Computer dungeon.
You’ll receive the Naturally Occurring Computer afterward.
Tech Container
Hidden in another section of the Secret Army Lab.
How to Get It
Before the time bomb sequence:
- Activate Sex Food.
- Use Power Fart to jump diagonally across the large pit.
- Complete the platforming section.
A previously unreachable chest contains the Tech Container.
Spy ****
Found inside the same hidden area as the previous collectible.
How to Get It
Visit the secret section of Car World Graveyard.
Look behind Barnold Jichael’s gravestone.
The collectible is hidden there.
Bheefed Johns
Easy to miss while progressing through Policy World.
How to Get It
While heading toward Commander Johnn’st:
- Reach the ghost-filled path.
- Find the dead end covered in tumbleweeds.
- Destroy the tumbleweeds.
The Bheefed Johns are hidden underneath.
Separate Thing for Corn
Requires defeating a specific enemy.
How to Get It
Head to the eastern side of Car World Bay.
You’ll find:
- A single land tile.
- A sun enemy circling it.
Kill the enemy using Power Fart.
The collectible appears afterward.
Hated Toilet
Probably one of the easiest collectibles to overlook.
How to Get It
While exploring the western river section of Car World:
- Cross the broken bridge.
- Navigate the rock maze.
- Search the left-side dead end.
The Hated Toilet is hidden there.
Take your time—the maze can be surprisingly confusing.
Meal Paste
Only available after returning to an earlier area.
How to Get It
Once you’ve obtained the Illegal Fart Tape:
- Return to the school.
- Use Power Fart to cross the pits in the lower-left section.
- Search the lockers.
One contains the Meal Paste.
Bone Pictures
A collectible that only appears later in the story.
How to Get It
Some time after completing Cleanview Well, return to City & Cops.
Visit Factoid’s grave.
Interact with the gravestone to collect Bone Pictures.
If it isn’t available yet, continue progressing through the story and check again later.
Terry-Cell Batteries
Requires an earlier story choice.
How to Get It
If you’ve already killed World War 2:
- Visit the Burial Ground in Policy World.
- Set him on fire again.
He’ll reward you with the Terry-Cell Batteries.
Yes, even after dying.
Genetic Components
Thankfully, this one is fairly simple.
How to Get It
Visit the army barracks where you first meet Navyjohn Battlemarine.
Search the bunk beds.
One of them contains the Genetic Components.
Beef Kit
Unlocked through a multi-step side quest.
How to Get It
- Defeat Commander Johnn’st.
- Visit the army barracks.
- Show the commander’s head to Navyjohn Battlemarine.
- Defeat Navyjohn.
- Return to the barracks.
- Speak with Greatgravy Gohnson.
He rewards you with the Beef Kit.
John’s Old Corn
Story collectible.
How to Get It
Heal Bike Brickford in Football using a Powdered Doctor.
This collectible cannot be missed.
John’s Grease
Another automatic story reward.
How to Get It
Heal Joast Smoke40Cigarettes Cigarette with a Powdered Doctor.
John’s Bill of Law
The third story-related collectible.
How to Get It
Heal Truck’s von Soldier using a Powdered Doctor.
Like the previous two, this one is part of the main story and is effectively impossible to miss.
Headcream
Hidden inside Kroker’s Tomb.
How to Get It
After obtaining the Green Key:
- Continue through the hallway lined with gravestones and urns.
- Search the upper-left corner carefully.
You’ll find the Headcream there.
Ronald’s Rub
The final collectible in the game.
How to Get It
During the game’s final sequence:
- Enter the building across from the well.
- Walk down the long hallway.
At the very end you’ll find Ronald’s Rub, completing the collection.
=Most of the collectibles in Fuck’s Quest II reward players who revisit old areas after major story events, so don’t assume a location is finished just because you’ve cleared it once. Keep an eye out for cracked walls, hidden paths, and NPCs whose dialogue changes as the story progresses, since several Crap items only become available later in the game.
If you’re going for 100% completion, it’s worth checking your in-game Crap menu from time to time. Since it’s organized in the same order as this guide, you can quickly compare what’s missing and head straight to the correct location instead of searching the entire world again.